Admit it. You’ve got a secret love.

You sketch shoe designs during meetings. You build toy trains in your basement. You sing arias in the shower.

You probably don’t tell too many people about your secret love.

Why not?

• “I’m not good enough yet.”
• “No one would care.”
• “I can’t make money doing it, so why bother.”
• “I’ll get to that after I’ve made my money and have more time.”

What if I told you that you are good enough, you can easily find people who care, you can make money and that you have plenty of time right now?

All you have to do is Go Pro.

In this post, I’m going to explain the process of “Going Pro” and how it is simpler and more powerful than you think. In the next 2 posts I’ll talk more about the benefits and the how-to for taking your secret love public.

What does it take to Go Pro?

If you are an athlete, it means accepting sponsorships and prize money. Basically, it means that you are getting paid to do what you love to do.

So to Go Pro, you only need 3 elements:

1. You
2. Your project
3. A customer or audience

You’ve got number 1 covered. (Congratulations!)

Now, what kind of project could you do? What does Going Pro look like?

Kate's First Gallery Show

It can start really simply. When my daughter Kate was 7, she had her first gallery show of paintings.

The gallery was our house and the show took place on Thanksgiving when we were hosting lots of out of town guests. She pulled together her favorite paintings and mounted them. We put them on the walls around the house.

I interviewed her and typed up her “Artist’s Statement” and put it up with a photo I had taken of her.

When everyone arrived, we had wine and cheese and the show began. She gave a brief talk about her art and inspirations. By the end, she got several offers.

Kate had Gone Pro.

Was she ready for New York? Not yet. But she knew more about what people liked. She knew more about putting together a portfolio. She had practice talking about her work in front of a group. She had experience now.

The next time she would be better.

So, what’s your goal for your secret love?

If you had all the money you would need and could focus on your love, what would you do?

Take that as the starting point for figuring out your project. (And if you need help finding your love, watch for an upcoming post on Life Experiments.)

What’s the easiest, safest way you can think of to make a “starter” version of your long-term goal? What would a 7-year-old do?

Next time I’ll talk about how I started this blog and what I learned about the benefits of Going Pro.

In the meantime, comment below with your thoughts and questions. How can you Go Pro? What's your secret love?

Photo courtesy Gianmaria Veronese

For most of my career, I was busy with work and the little remaining time was dedicated to my family. While this arrangement made me feel like I was taking care of everything, over time it left me feeling hollow.

Somehow I knew that the empty feeling was from not doing the things in life I was born to do.

When the pace would slow down a bit I would think up big plans for how I could fix my work or my life to fill that gap. But none of these dreams were practical – and deep down I didn’t believe that they would really fix things anyway.

Then one Saturday afternoon about ten years ago, I had a realization: I had been getting little signals all along about how to find what I was made to do. I just needed to follow my spark.

It happened when I took this photo of my daughter.

The little teardrop under Meg’s left eye took my breath away. I didn’t know why, but luckily I decided to do more photography.

I've since realized that it wasn’t because I was meant to only do photography.

But the photography tapped into the spark in me. It was the start of a great journey.

Following the photography led to amazing growth in my life. I met new friends. I took some beautiful photos of my daughters. I learned a lot about myself. Through more than a few ups and downs, photography taught me how to learn new things without going to school and without having to stop working or being a good dad and husband.

Through these and other paths, seeds were planted that helped shape what I get to do now: At a photography school in the mountains of North Carolina I shared a room with 70-year old Bob and learned how he managed a sane career at GE. In a photography group I learned about Photoshop but also met the blogger who inspired Avocationist.com.

You are not meant to feel like you are missing something inside.

When you start paying attention to your spark, that hollow ache will go away immediately. In its place will be energy and hope. And they lead to inspiration and ideas.

Here are some places to pay attention: What makes your heart beat faster? What stores always grab your eye? Whom do you admire?

Follow those impulses and find your spark.

Here's a quick way to try out your secret dreams, create some new ideas and sow the seeds of your next adventure - all without leaving your desk.

Today I used it to feed my "travel jones" during lunch: I went to Brazil.

Here's my Lunch Break Dream Launch process:

1. Choose the first interest that pops into your head

Start the process with any dream you have - world travel, music, woodworking. Think quickly and capture the first things that come to mind.

Then write down what your dream is - it's fine to be vague, high-level and even a little crazy at this point. You might want to go to every country in the world or play clarinet at Carnegie Hall or learn how to call square dances. The only requirement is to actually write the idea down.

Then, spend 10 minutes on Google searching for the main words in your dream - for example, "world travel", "clarinet", "square dancing".

2. Get more specific to get more creative

As you get results back, follow your instincts and click on any site that draws your attention. For example, if you like movies and travel, you might do a search and remember that you've always wanted to go to the Cannes Film Festival.

Then do a search on that more specific version of your dream. Look for the details you would need to make a good plan.

Maybe Cannes is too far off for now. But find out when it is. (It's in May and the weather is lovely - I checked).

Maybe you don't have the money to pay for a fancy hotel on the Cote d'Azur or to rent a yacht in the harbor. So search some travel sites to see if there are creative ways to get there - Can you volunteer? Can you offer to lead a tour group? Can you get a pass from a small film production company?

As you begin to dig for details, you'll start to broaden the list of ways you can experience your dreams.

3. When you get stuck, blow it up

If you get stuck or bored, take a different direction.

You could see what other film festivals are going on - there are several in the US. Find one near a city where you have a friend or relative (= free place to stay).

Or think about the "pieces" of your dream. When you think about "Film Festivals", what does that bring to mind?

Is part of it seeing interesting movies? Then find out what is showing at your local Art Theatre or University. Leave work on time one day this week and catch the 7pm show.

Is part of it sharing your perspective? Write a review of the movie.

Is part of it the thrill of interacting with other film buffs? Send a note to the film's director with your feedback.

4. Tangents can become your new path in life

Traveling to South America is on my list of dreams, so today I searched for cities in Brazil and Argentina. While looking for cheap ways to travel, I stumbled across a website called "couchsurfing.org" with a list of people who would let me crash at their houses for free. I searched not just in Brazil, but also in California (where I'm headed on a business trip soon). Then I went to Orbitz and researched flight schedules and costs.

With each new piece of information, I'm building on a plan that can someday soon get me to South America. And I know I'll be able to do it while managing my household budget and my other responsibilities.

See how it goes?

5. What's in it for you

Now, I may not take this particular trip to Brazil. And that's perfectly fine. Even if I never make it there, my Lunch Break Dream Launch has given me some powerful benefits:

I spent time on me. I got to do something just for fun and I broke up the monotony of a regular day.

I focused my brain on what matters to me. Even when I stopped doing the search, there was part of my mind that was still thinking and scheming and planning.

I motivated myself to keep going. Now that I've started planning, I am looking forward to my next 15 minute break where I can find out more and take the next steps.

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Check out what I learned at a No Doubt concert this weekend - how to know when you have outgrown your work.

Watch until the end for an invitation to a series of classes I'm offering (you can also get more information here).

Want to do something different, but can't figure out what it is? Or how to do more meaningful work without jeopardizing your lifestyle?

Join me for a special tele-class this Wednesday night, June 10th at 5pm ET: Don't wait to test-drive your dreams (How to start now without quitting your job).

It's free for my newsletter subscribers.

This tele-class is part of a series I'm offering to take you from "I don't know what I want to be when I grow up" to "I would never have been able to envision how rich my life is now."

Sign up now because there are a limited number of spots left. I'll email you more details and a link to the recording of our first tele-class: "How to find a job as fun as your life was as a kid."

Here's what you need to do:

1. Click here to sign up
2. Sign up for my newsletter (it's free, too)

You can get more details and check out the whole list of upcoming classes here.

On my first trip to Hong Kong, I learned that they can be great times to try out new interests - the first step towards developing your calling.

Tom met a woman once who came close, but when every date was compared to that top 10 ideal, how could any real-life relationship survive? (By the way, he's pushing 40 now and is still single.)

I think that Tom had it all backwards.

Tom was working too hard on having everything figured out up front, and not enough time getting out there and being open to the spark he would feel when he met someone who was a good fit for him. That feeling of attraction would be a much more accurate indicator of a good match than any 10 or 100 or 1000 item list Tom could come up with.

And his list kept Tom from starting relationships that could have taught him the true way long-term couples stay together: It's not because they are perfect matches, it's because they have committed to the relationship.

They've committed to something bigger than just their own "Top 10 lists" of needs.

I'm telling you this because I made my own "Tom list" - only I wasn't looking for the Perfect Girl, I was looking for the Perfect Job.

And I didn't have any more success with my list than Tom did with his.

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Even though I knew how self-defeating this "Tom's Top 10" approach was in relationships, I went through much of my career thinking that the perfect job was not only achievable, but that it was the only way to have a career that was both meaningful and enjoyable.

And I had figured out the perfect route to the perfect job:

All I needed was a perfect understanding of myself...

E-S-F J-Oh-My

ESFJ, "mid D, high I, low S, low C", StrengthsFinder "Individualization and Ideation Themes".

Do any of these sound familiar? They are "types" - the outputs of career tests. I have a thick binder at home that has the results of all of the tests I've taken over the years.

They are fun to do. I always come away feeling better about myself because they write the "type" descriptions in ways that emphasize the positive. Everyone ends up with a type description like the fortune cookie I've gotten a few times: "You are talented in many ways". Or the Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes envelopes: "Congratulations, you are a winner!"

The nice thing about all of these tests was that they were easy. Not much work for me: I just wrote the check, took the test and waited for the debriefing afterwards.

But as I kept asking "What do I do with these results?", I started to realize something important - these tests aren't really designed to help you identify your ideal work - they are a short-cut to help career counselors get a quick read on you. And, they provide a standardized way for them to give advice "in categories".

This isn't a bad thing, but it started to undermine the credibility of this "perfect job" idea that I had.

And, as I learned more about myself, I realized that I was just adding more and more requirements to my list.

Like Tom with his idea of the perfect girl, I was bordering on the ridiculous because no company or job was going to be able to provide this complex mix of needs.

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Photo courtesy woodleywonderworks

Because I was traveling so far, I had to stay over the weekend. So as a way to keep in touch with my daughters, I came up with a game.

They each gave me a list of 5 things that they wanted a photo of. This provided "focus" for my sightseeing time and was a fun way to spice up my emails.

So, I photographed a chicken, a lot of dogs and even an elephant (I had to cheat on this one - it was on a bag of Indian rice at a grocery store). The only one I couldn't get was a squirrel - apparently there aren't many of them in Hong Kong.

But because I was so aware of everything around me, I saw some other things, too. Like the flower vendors and the way they wrapped their products. And the way people talked to each other on the Star Ferry going to the main island.

And it reminded me of times when I had "a-ha" moments in my career. Times where something just clicked and I realized what I needed to do next - and then saw opportunities all over the place.

One time when I was still in my original science career (see bio), I realized that I really wanted to work more with people, but couldn't see how to make it happen.

Then one day in a conversation with a friend, I realized that all the things I liked to do were really just what sales people do. When I realized that, I immediately thought of the perfect place for me to go - and I was unstuck and on my way.

In Hong Kong, one of the funnest photos I got was of a Chinese "fortune cat" - with one arm raised and beckoning, it is a staple in shops and is believed to bring in money. I had never seen one, so I took a video of one of them moving its arm back and forth at me.

This was my favorite because of an inside joke I share with my daughters about me and cats (they say I'm scared of them, I say I just don't like them and their claws).

But I wouldn't have noticed that cat if I wasn't so aware of all the new things I was experiencing, and if I weren't looking for the photo scavenger hunt items to share with my daughters. I had my girls on my mind everywhere I went on that trip.

What do you notice? And what do you miss?

When you are frustrated, or stuck, you only notice the things you always notice. When you are clear on what you are after, you can see lots of opportunity around every corner.

You are curious, you are open.

So: go somewhere new, go with a purpose, mix it up.

Photo: talicat2000